Today, we were scheduled to be with the kids at the foster carer's home from 2 pm until bedtime. The plan at this stage, is that we observe how the foster carer parents the children, so that we can provide something similar to begin with. It's not quite working out like that...
When we arrived, It was just J at home as A was still at school. J was in the lounge with absolutely nothing to play with except a cardboard tube and CBeebies on the TV. It's not that the kids don't have toys. We're gradually bringing piles of them back with us. But for some reason, the foster carers seem incredibly reluctant to encourage them to get the toys out.
So we played with J, with the cardboard tube. We managed to fill about 30 minutes with this slightly limited resource. Using the tube as a telescope, a trumpet and something to play catch with. Andy did lots of rough and tumble. I was quickly thinking "How on earth are we going to fill our time?" I suggested getting some toys out, but Foster Carer said "he's not really one for toys." So we went out in the yard and J rode his scooter up and down whilst the two caged dogs barked.
We all went to collect Aaron from school. Foster Carer's main concern was that J 'Walked Nicely'. He was holding Mummy and Daddy's hand. We lasted about 5 minutes of 'Walking Nicely' before we did jumping together and counting steps and Andy and I were lifting him up by his arms so he could 'fly'.
We had a fabulous time with the kids. We went for a walk, just the four of us, and took A and J's scooters with us. Foster Carer pointed us in the direction of a brilliant long, flat path with no traffic around which was just perfect for scootering.
Then it was back home for more improvised play with almost nothing to play with. I actually think we did remarkably well to keep them entertained, under the circumstances. Not sure if Foster Carer approves of our playing rather enthusiastically and noisily with the kids. I think she sees us as a soft touch and very disruptive. We did do some boundary keeping. In a gentle sort of way. But I think the physical play is really great for bonding.
Until tomorrow...
Cathy! Exciting news! I haven't checked your blog since January and I didn't realize you were so far down the process! CONGRATULATIONS! This is such a joyful time. Don't worry about the foster carers, I'm sure they are doing their best to provide a good and loving home for the boys, and you and Andy will do the same. You'll just have different styles, which is to be expected. It took me a while to really develop a good bond with the V's foster parents, but now we really appreciate each other and respect our differences. The biggest area of discomfort for me was our very different religious views, but we are past that now.
ReplyDeleteI'm so happy for you!